I have a propensity to fix people. It’s all done out of love, of course; I love you and I want the best for you and want you to be happy and healthy and whole and free so when I see something hindering any of those I have a tendency to try to “help” you. To correct you. To fix you. It makes perfect sense in my mind: “That person is making a mistake and I know the answer so I should share the answer with them because that’s what loving people do.” I’ve tried to resist fixing people, I really have, but the closer you are to me and the more I love you the less success I’ve had at keeping my big mouth shut. Basically, if I love you I’m going to try to fix you.
This propensity is, naturally, riddled with flaws. Over the years I’ve learned a couple of truths the hard way.
- I don’t have all the right answers. As convinced as I am that I do, I really don’t.
- Most people don’t want to be fixed. Sure they know they’re broken, but the reality is most don’t care enough about their brokenness to do anything about it.
- And even if people did want to be fixed, I have not been appointed the fixer of people. I’m just Ken, a guy who is on this journey with everyone else. Nobody elected me the fixer.
- My fixing often produces more problems than solutions. I’ve hurt a lot of people trying to fix them.
- I need as much fixing as everyone else.
It was this final truth that has caught me the most off guard. I need to be fixed. I’m broken. I’m flawed. I’ve got problems. No, I mean I’ve got severe problems in my thinking, my conclusions, my assumptions, and in my entire worldview. And the biggest problem I have is that I don’t REALLY think I have a problem. I don’t really believe that I need to be fixed. Deep down in my heart I believe that it is everyone else who needs fixing. What I really believe is that I’m in pretty good shape, mostly. And that’s what clued me in to the suspicion that I might have a problem. I don’t think I need to be fixed, and that is how I know that I desperately need to be fixed. Which has led me to this new discovery.
THE OBJECTIVE OF LIFE ISN’T TO FIX,
IT IS SIMPLY TO BE FIXED.
You see, Jesus is in the fixing business. He is the healer. He is the refiner. He is the cultivator. He is the grower. He is the vine. I’m a broken person who lives in a broken world. And Jesus is the One who will fix all of this. My job is simply to be still, to trust in him, and to allow him to fix all my brokenness. I am the one being fixed.
This changes everything…